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Rectum?! Yep... sure did...
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Rectum?! Yep... sure did...

Oh, hi. I didn't see you there, as I was busy picking pieces of my ass off the floor... you know, the ass that had been ripped clean offa my backhole after pulling a brutal all-weekender, right after pulling a brutal three-or-four-week-freelancer. If I don't ever have to descend into that seeping, hellmouth of a basement to plop my no-longer-there-ass in front of those soul-sucking giant monitors again, it'll be too soon. What's that? I have to do it tomorrow? Oh, okay.

I have to say, though, that part of me relished the challenge of the all-weekender. It was an impossible task I had to accomplish -- create this massive audio demo, chock full of sound effects, music and voice-over, for this project we may or may not get -- but I think it ended up sounding pretty craptacular. It reminded me of the old days... back when I could stay up working until two in the morning, back when I knew people over the age of nine, back when the only extremity that tingled was the one that was supposed to tingle... back when I didn't have to look for energy in the bottom of a 1/2 gallon coffee mug... back before my fucking neck started getting all crepe-y.

The other part of me, though, relishes being a crabby fucking shitball. Who the fuck wants to stay up until two? Working, no less?! And I like hanging around people under ten -- they're very easy to please, I can crack their asses up by simply blowing a fart, and if I manage to feed, clothe and mildly amuse them on a fairly regular basis, they think I'm the fucking shit. And I like coffee, goddammit.

But the crepe-y neck thing is a fucking pisser.

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